21 things your friends say when they return from Australia

It's Australia Day?

That wasn't a question, I was just using an inflection at the end there to sound Australian. Finally, some of our friends are returning from Australia, bringing their tales and experience for our ears to be polluted with. Here's what they'll be saying, for the first while at least.

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1. I forgot how cold it gets here. 2. We used to have a BBQ every night. 3. I fought a shark with my bare hands one time. 4. You'll just never understand the connection Corey and I had, you wouldn't get that over here. 5. I shifted two Hemsworth brothers. 6. Sorry, I'm still on Australian time (When they've been home for six months). 7. Ugh, I just can't wait to go back. The place is calling me. 8. It's a different world over there. 9. Time just seemed to go slower there. 10. I'll never forget the time I got so drunk I ended up sleeping in a kangaroo's pouch. 11. You haven't lived until you've spent Christmas on the beach. 12. I shifted four of the lads from Home and Away. 13. A snake bit my friend and I sucked the venom out. I essentially saved her life. 14. Oh I forgot ye don't have Tim Tams over here. You're missing out. 15. Honestly, there were spiders the size of Paul O'Connell in our shower. 16. Thankfully, Mammy sent me a care package of Tayto and Lyons Tea every fortnight. 17. How much is that in dollars now? Australian dollars. Did I mention I was in Australia for a year? 18. I brought back 17 pairs of Ugg Boots if you want to buy some? 19. You learn a lot about yourself on a 24 hour flight. 20. That's so funny, something similar happened when I was in Australia. 21. Remember the colour I had when I got back? Jesus, I was gorgeous.