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Dress, venue, food: why picking-apart weddings is all too common

Published 18:25 24 May 2017 BST

Updated 18:28 24 May 2017 BST

Laura Holland

Dress, venue, food: why picking-apart weddings is all too common

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Welcome to The Bride Files - covering all things related to weddings as Laura prepares for her big day.

The Pippa Middleton wedding fuss seems to have finally died down. Stories and photos from her wedding were splashed across every news site and newspaper stand all last weekend and earlier this week. It was Pippa's moment in the sun this month but it will be someone else's next month. Why are we so enthralled with other people's weddings? It doesn't have to be as far removed as Pippa. We also want to know about our next door neighbour, an old classmate or even an ex-colleague. Why is that? Because we are just that nosey. And that's OK - to a point. We want to know what dress she wore, what flowers she chose, how she wore her hair and whether she wore a veil. It's not limited to just the bride, with aspects of the day and setting also catching our attention.

I know that I have always been interested in other people's weddings but it peaked when I got engaged. Before, I just wanted to have a cheeky stalk on their day but now I inspect every last detail in preparation for my own day. I'm slowly learning that I'm not alone with people who aren't even engaged also intrigued by the little bits. With our nosiness comes the criticism. Poor Pippa had only stepped outside the wedding car before the first pictures of her surfaced online. They quickly spread like wildfire with media outlets all around the world casting aside other stories to get the first hit from the Pippa obsession.

WhatsApp groups were set alight, "Did you see what she was wearing?", "Not sure about the neckline," "And what about her sister." We're so quick to be pass remarkable because we're far removed from the situation and so it feels like it will do no harm. But imagine if you were that woman on one of the most special and important days of your life. Imagine being spoken about by people who don't know you all around the world. It's not necessarily an opportunity to criticise (although plenty of that happens too) but everyone has an opinion on how things 'should' be done when it comes to saying 'i do'. Even the smallest detail that you've chosen for your big day becomes open to debate amongst friends and family. Why you're not getting married in church, where you're having your reception, the way you want to wear your hair on the day, the flowers you want, the flowers you don't want, what shoes you want to wear, the dress you've chosen and so on. There will always be one person, or two, who is quick to 'advise' you on your decisions. "You can't do that," is a comment lots of brides and grooms hear in the run-up to their wedding. My response, "Why not?" Is there some sort of wedding rule book that I have missed that you must stick to. God forbid you would organise something your own way. At the end of the day, we never stop being nosey. It's not necessarily because it's a wedding - it's because we're interested other people's lives. We just need to make sure that our nosiness is measured and restrained so that the people involved don't feel pressure or whispering in the run up to their big day.

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